I’m 27, and I got a divorce – 本人男27.今年年初离婚了 – English

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I am a 27 year old man. At the beginning of this year I went through a divorce, and now I work in Shenzhen, alone, without a car or house, although my finances are average and I have a tall figure. There were many reasons for the divorce. The first four years of our five year marriage were fine. We did not work together, but we were not too far apart. We were like most couples; we had our arguments but also our happy times! Last April she left her job because she wanted to start a business. After two months of discussion we decided to open a convenience store near her family home. I used money I had saved for years to open this store, but a few days later she got a job in a different city.

The money had been spent, so there was nothing for it but to bite the bullet and open the store! Sometimes her father would come and mind the store while I went to buy stock, for which I was very grateful. Then by a very lucky chance, I realised that her father had been taking money from the till! I said nothing and acted as though nothing was wrong. I only tightened the security, and although there was some friction between us, I simply endured. I figured I could sell the store to him at the end of the year.

After that, every time I called she was too busy to talk. We didn’t even have thirty minutes of conversation during one month. I knew there was something wrong, but she continued to avoid me. It was early November when she suddenly asked me to help her father open a stall in a shopping mall to sell winter clothing. I would get a salary and a shre in the profits, 8 yuan for each piece of clothing sold. I though that this was a turning point for our relationship, one that could stave off the storm, so I agreed. He didn’t know how to run a business, so basically I was the one managing the store and the money. We sold 900 pieces of clothing in a month. When my mother fell ill, my wife refused to take leave to take care of her, so I had to go back. Her father gave me a monthly salary of 3500yuan, and said that the share of the profits would be calculated at the end of the next month. I was hurting for money, so had no choice but to sell the convenience store at a loss, within two days. So I handed the store over to my father-in-law, explained to him about the goods and the record books, and went home. After I’d been home for six months, my mother came out of hospital with a clean bill of health. My father-in-law called to say that there was a problem with the figures, that there were items missing. I was speechless: I’d made all the figures clear before I left, and he waited six months to find issues? I asked him to send me a photo of the account book, but he delayed until the new year. When the new year had passed my wife still refused to come home. We discussed our issues in detail, and it was only when I pressed her that she admitted she wanted a divorce. She said it was because my business meant she couldn’t live like a proper married woman, and that I had cost her father his savings (In December, which should have been the busiest month of the year, they had sold 300 items….) When I heard this I was struck dumb. Oh now I understood, truly will you find every kind of bird in a large forest! 这样的极品都能让我遇上!All of a sudden I came to my senses. I had been looking for answers, looking for a way to solve this, but when there is no love then there is no love, and a fart could be the excuse for breaking up. Marriage relies on both parties participating fully, and when one person isn’t fully invested, there’s nothing the other person can do. Although I had been very resentful, I thought of the past and became strangely calm. Fine. You were once closer to me than my own family, and I had tried every way of keeping you. But now you do not want to suffer with me, and I so I won’t make you! We will go to the Civil Affairs Bureau and get a divorce, parting on good terms. I won’t bother you, you own’t bother mean, and we will each have our own peace! Then I told her father to calculate the money for the missing items, and immediately sent that sum to him. There will be people who say that this was stupid.

When the new year had passed my wife still refused to come home. We discussed our issues in detail, and it was only when I pressed her that she admitted she wanted a divorce. She said it was because my business meant she couldn’t live like a proper married woman, and that I had cost her father his savings (In December, which should have been the busiest month of the year, they had sold 300 items….)

得要分就分得彻底些,得能用钱解决的问题都是小问题,斩断所有以后可能会纠葛不清

的东西。虽然花了这五年时间才认清枕边人,有点心凉!当然,婚姻里是无法定论谁错

Then I told her father to calculate the money for the missing items, and immediately sent that sum to him. There will be people who say that this was stupid.

的车子房子和幸福的生活?
现在的我,只想好好过以后的生活,不是要活给谁看,而是为了对自己好点,年轻人通

其实后来想想也挺庆幸的,我只是经历了一场5年的婚姻和一个不爱我的人,至少现在我还年轻,还有机会去拼搏,不愿和我一起打拼的人,有什么资格享受我以后可以拥有

When the new year had passed my wife still refused to come home. We discussed our issues in detail, and it was only when I pressed her that she admitted she wanted a divorce. She said it was because my business meant she couldn’t live like a proper married woman, and that I had cost her father his savings (In December, which should have been the busiest month of the year, they had sold 300 items….)

但也不会呆,我是个会聊天的人!还未事业有成,却是个潜力股。想结识真诚的女性朋

Although I had been very resentful, I thought of the past and became strangely calm. Fine. You were once closer to me than my own family, and I had tried every way of keeping you. But now you do not want to suffer with me, and I so I won’t make you! We will go to the Civil Affairs Bureau and get a divorce, parting on good terms. I won’t bother you, you own’t bother mean, and we will each have our own peace!
After I’d been home for six months, my mother came out of hospital with a clean bill of health. My father-in-law called to say that there was a problem with the figures, that there were items missing. I was speechless: I’d made all the figures clear before I left, and he waited six months to find issues? I asked him to send me a photo of the account book, but he delayed until the new year.

过努力与肯吃苦耐劳才能得世间财。有时人的成功要靠积累和一点点的运气!永远都相
信的一句话:世上没有免费的午餐!

在此也来个征婚交友吧:

本人男27,体重60,身高168,广东人,在深圳龙岗工作。能开玩笑,不是特别幽默,

It was early November when she suddenly asked me to help her father open a stall in a shopping mall to sell winter clothing. I would get a salary and a shre in the profits, 8 yuan for each piece of clothing sold. I though that this was a turning point for our relationship, one that could stave off the storm, so I agreed. He didn’t know how to run a business, so basically I was the one managing the store and the money. We sold 900 pieces of clothing in a month. When my mother fell ill, my wife refused to take leave to take care of her, so I had to go back.

It was early November when she suddenly asked me to help her father open a stall in a shopping mall to sell winter clothing. I would get a salary and a shre in the profits, 8 yuan for each piece of clothing sold. I though that this was a turning point for our relationship, one that could stave off the storm, so I agreed. He didn’t know how to run a business, so basically I was the one managing the store and the money. We sold 900 pieces of clothing in a month. When my mother fell ill, my wife refused to take leave to take care of her, so I had to go back.

Her father gave me a monthly salary of 3500yuan, and said that the share of the profits would be calculated at the end of the next month. I was hurting for money, so had no choice but to sell the convenience store at a loss, which I did within two days. So I handed the store over to my father-in-law, explained to him about the goods and the record books, and went home.

After I’d been home for six months, my mother came out of hospital with a clean bill of health. My father-in-law called to say that there was a problem with the figures, that there were items missing. I was speechless: I’d made all the figures clear before I left, and he waited six months to find issues? I asked him to send me a photo of the account book, but he delayed until the new year.

Her father gave me a monthly salary of 3500yuan, and said that the share of the profits would be calculated at the end of the next month. I was hurting for money, so had no choice but to sell the convenience store at a loss, which I did within two days. So I handed the store over to my father-in-law, explained to him about the goods and the record books, and went home.

After I’d been home for six months, my mother came out of hospital with a clean bill of health. My father-in-law called to say that there was a problem with the figures, that there were items missing. I was speechless: I’d made all the figures clear before I left, and he waited six months to find issues? I asked him to send me a photo of the account book, but he delayed until the new year.

When the new year had passed my wife still refused to come home. We discussed our issues in detail, and it was only when I pressed her that she admitted she wanted a divorce. She said it was because my business meant she couldn’t live like a proper married woman, and that I had cost her father his savings (In December, which should have been the busiest month of the year, they had sold 300 items….)

When I heard this I was struck dumb. Oh now I understood, truly will you find every kind of bird in a large forest! 这样的极品都能让我遇上!All of a sudden I came to my senses. I had been looking for answers, looking for a way to solve this, but when there is no love then there is no love, and a fart could be the excuse for breaking up. Marriage relies on both parties participating fully, and when one person isn’t fully invested, there’s nothing the other person can do.

Although I had been very resentful, I thought of the past and became strangely calm. Fine. You were once closer to me than my own family, and I had tried every way of keeping you. But now you do not want to suffer with me, and I so I won’t make you! We will go to the Civil Affairs Bureau and get a divorce, parting on good terms. I won’t bother you, you own’t bother mean, and we will each have our own peace!

Then I told her father to calculate the money for the missing items, and immediately sent that sum to him. There will be people who say that this was stupid, but I think
The money had been spent, so there was nothing for it but to bite the bullet and open the store! Sometimes her father would come and mind the store while I went to buy stock, for which I was very grateful.

Then by a very lucky chance, I realised that her father had been taking money from the till! I said nothing and acted as though nothing was wrong. I only tightened the security, and although there was some friction between us, I simply endured. I figured I could sell the store at the end of the year.
It was early November when she suddenly asked me to help her father open a stall in a shopping mall to sell winter clothing. I would get a salary and a shre in the profits, 8 yuan for each piece of clothing sold. I though that this was a turning point for our relationship, one that could stave off the storm, so I agreed. 他们不会做生意,基本都是我在打理和管钱,刚好做了一个月时卖出900件。我妈妈病重,她不肯请假回去照顾,没办法我只好回去。
他爸给了我一个月工资3500,说分红下个月收场再结算。没办法缺钱用,只好两天内我把便利店亏本转出去了,和她爸爸交接好,当场点清楚货物与登记账本才回家。
回家半个月后,我妈顺利出院。她爸爸打电话来说数目出错了,差了很多件。我有点无语,数目是当场点清的,半个月后还会差?让他爸爸发记账本的照片又不发,一直拖到过年,
快过年了她还是不肯回来。我和她很仔细聊了大家婚姻的问题,在我的追问之下她才说想和我离婚,说我做生意都没能让她过上少奶奶的生活,说我吞了她爸爸的钱(12月份本应是生意最好的一个月,他们只卖出了300件)。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。
听完这些话我沉默不语。靠,我了个去,真是林子大了,什么鸟都有!这样的极品都能让我遇上!那一刻突然想通了,原本一直想找原因,想去解决问题,原来不爱了就是不爱了,放个屁都可以是分开的理由,婚姻是要靠两个人去经营的,一方不想过了,另一方怎么努力也没用。
想起过去的种种,本来愤愤不平的我却异常冷静:好吧,你本是在我身边比亲人还要亲的人,能挽留方法都试过了,现在你不想和我挨苦,我也不想强求!回来去民政局签字,大家好聚好散,我不烦你,你不烦我,各自还各自的清静!
然后让她爸爸算清楚差了多少件,我马上打钱过去。有的人说我这样很傻,呵呵,我觉

Afterwards, everytime I called her she seemed to be too busy to talk. The time we had spent conversing in a month was likely no more than half an hour. I knew there was something wrong, but she continued to avoid me.
It was early November when she suddenly asked me to help her father open a stall in a shopping mall to sell winter clothing. I would get a salary and a shre in the profits, 8 yuan for each piece of clothing sold. I though that this was a turning point for our relationship, one that could stave off the storm, so I agreed. He didn’t know how to run a business, so basically I was the one managing the store and the money. We sold 900 pieces of clothing in a month. When my mother fell ill, my wife refused to take leave to take care of her, so I had to go back.
Her father gave me a monthly salary of 3500yuan, and said that the share of the profits would be calculated at the end of the next month. I was hurting for money, so had no choice but to sell the convenience store at a loss, which I did within two days. So I handed the store over to my father-in-law, explained to him about the goods and the record books, and went home.
After I’d been home for six months, my mother came out of hospital with a clean bill of health. My father-in-law called to say that there was a problem with the figures, that there were items missing. I was speechless: I’d made all the figures clear before I left, and he waited six months to find issues? I asked him to send me a photo of the account book, but he delayed until the new year.
When the new year had passed my wife still refused to come home. We discussed our issues in detail, and it was only when I pressed her that she admitted she wanted a divorce. She said it was because my business meant she couldn’t live like a proper married woman, and that I had cost her father his savings (In December, which should have been the busiest month of the year, they had sold 300 items….)
When I heard this I was struck dumb. Oh now I understood, truly will you find every kind of bird in a large forest! 这样的极品都能让我遇上!All of a sudden I came to my senses. I had been looking for answers, looking for a way to solve this, but when there is no love then there is no love, and a fart could be the excuse for breaking up. Marriage relies on both parties participating fully, and when one person isn’t fully invested, there’s nothing the other person can do.

11月初她突然求我帮她爸爸摆摊做大卖场冬天的衣服,有工资和分红,卖出一件分红8元,我以为是婚姻风暴来临前的转机,就同意了。他们不会做生意,基本都是我在打理和管钱,刚好做了一个月时卖出900件。我妈妈病重,她不肯请假回去照顾,没办法我只好回去。

他爸给了我一个月工资3500,说分红下个月收场再结算。没办法缺钱用,只好两天内我把便利店亏本转出去了,和她爸爸交接好,当场点清楚货物与登记账本才回家。

回家半个月后,我妈顺利出院。她爸爸打电话来说数目出错了,差了很多件。我有点无语,数目是当场点清的,半个月后还会差?让他爸爸发记账本的照片又不发,一直拖到过年,

快过年了她还是不肯回来。我和她很仔细聊了大家婚姻的问题,在我的追问之下她才说想和我离婚,说我做生意都没能让她过上少奶奶的生活,说我吞了她爸爸的钱(12月份本应是生意最好的一个月,他们只卖出了300件)。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。

听完这些话我沉默不语。靠,我了个去,真是林子大了,什么鸟都有!这样的极品都能让我遇上!那一刻突然想通了,原本一直想找原因,想去解决问题,原来不爱了就是不爱了,放个屁都可以是分开的理由,婚姻是要靠两个人去经营的,一方不想过了,另一方怎么努力也没用。

想起过去的种种,本来愤愤不平的我却异常冷静:好吧,你本是在我身边比亲人还要亲的人,能挽留方法都试过了,现在你不想和我挨苦,我也不想强求!回来去民政局签字,大家好聚好散,我不烦你,你不烦我,各自还各自的清静!

然后让她爸爸算清楚差了多少件,我马上打钱过去。有的人说我这样很傻,呵呵,我觉
得要分就分得彻底些,得能用钱解决的问题都是小问题,斩断所有以后可能会纠葛不清
的东西。虽然花了这五年时间才认清枕边人,有点心凉!当然,婚姻里是无法定论谁错
谁对的,换个角度来说,可能我也浪费了她5年的青春吧,硬是要分对错,可能两个人都
有错吧!只是很多东西都无从考究了。

其实后来想想也挺庆幸的,我只是经历了一场5年的婚姻和一个不爱我的人,至少现在我还年轻,还有机会去拼搏,不愿和我一起打拼的人,有什么资格享受我以后可以拥有
的车子房子和幸福的生活?

现在的我,只想好好过以后的生活,不是要活给谁看,而是为了对自己好点,年轻人通
过努力与肯吃苦耐劳才能得世间财。有时人的成功要靠积累和一点点的运气!永远都相
信的一句话:世上没有免费的午餐!

在此也来个征婚交友吧:

本人男27,体重60,身高168,广东人,在深圳龙岗工作。能开玩笑,不是特别幽默,
但也不会呆,我是个会聊天的人!还未事业有成,却是个潜力股。想结识真诚的女性朋
友。能谈谈人生聊聊理想,我人生中对的人在哪里???

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Source : Shu Dong

About julien.leyre

French-Australian writer, educator, sinophile. Any question? Contact julien@marcopoloproject.org